The Season of Favor II, Bible Stud

Posted on May 21, 2016 by growintheword

favorpic

“How Favor impacts your relationships”

 

Synopsis of Bible Study 05/18/16

Delivered by Bishop Walker III

 

Favor of the Lord

We throw this word “Favor” around loosely. The truth is, Favor costs something. First of all, there is a responsibility of stewardship that comes with Favor.

  1. When Favor is on your life, you got to be able to trust God enough to know that if he gave it, you are supposed to use it to bless His name.
  2. Psalm 106:4 (NKJV) says 4 Remember me, O Lord, with the Favor You have toward Your people. Oh, visit me with Your salvation, – The author here is saying, “Lord don’t let Favor skip my house. Let it fall right here”. We need God’s Favor on everything connected to us.
  3. Having Favor on our life brings many rewards. It allows us to experience the benefits. Psalm 103:2 (NKJV) says 2 Bless the Lord, O my soul, And forget not all His benefits: – Favor brings about benefits.
    1. One benefit of walking in Favor is you have the power of attraction in your life. When you have power of attraction on your life, you can attract people as well as things. When you have Favor, you no longer chase stuff, stuff chases you. In other words, things are drawn to you.
  4. There is a responsibility to be careful of what comes and tries to attach itself to you. It can be drawn to you, but everything drawn to you, might not have been attended to be attached to you. You have to ask God for discernment, so that you will be able to know the difference between what God sends (that was drawn to you) and what Satan sends (that was drawn to you). When Favor is in your life, stuff has a way of finding you whether it be good or bad.
  5. The Favor of God is so precious, it must be handled with care. Matthew 5:16 (NKJV) says 16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father which is in heaven. – It is important to know that the Favor of God is to demonstrate the glory of God in the earth. You can’t use the glory of God in such a way that it draws all the attention to you. You ought to want your light to shine that God might be glorified. Ex- People that live in the south know that if you turn on the lights in the dark, bugs, flies, and everything thing else is attracted to it. When you turn on the light, you will begin to see everything that flies around in the dark. In like manner, when you let your light shine, God will reveal the stuff around you. He will reveal the bugs that are trying to get close to you.

 

 

How do I maintain a season of Favor?

  1. You got to believe Favor is for you – Favor is on your life, placed there by God. Just like Jacob who placed a coat of many colors on Joseph, God has placed Favor on you. Don’t be afraid of the coat that was placed on you. Don’t be ashamed to wear your coat. Wear your Favor with pride. If God blesses you or opens a door for you, wear your coat. Stop hiding your blessings. After all, God gave it to. Psalm 90:17 (NKJV) says 17 And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us, And establish the work of our hands for us; Yes, establish the work of our hands. – When God blesses you, it is to establish his work here on the earth. How can you sing the song “he’s blessing me … ” or “… He’s leaning in my direction…”, and never allow us to see the blessing? At some point, people need to see God blessing you.
    1. The Favor is not in what your drive or where you live, it is in who you are. The brothers stripped Joseph of his coat, thinking they were taking the Favor off of him. You have to understand that when you have favor, the favor is on you no matter where you are.
    2. Joseph’s brothers stripped Joseph, lied on him, put him in the pit, but Potiphar found him. When he was accused of coming on to his wife, he was thrown into prison, but Favor still found him. As a result, Joseph ended up in the midst of Egypt working right next to Pharaoh. Joseph ended up being the one who passed out the bread to those suffering from the famine. Joseph was so humble, he even passed out bread to the same brothers that tried to strip his Favor and sold him into captivity. Genesis 50:20 (NKJV) says 20 But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. – Sometimes you got to thank your enemies, because if they hadn’t done what they did, you wouldn’t be where you are today.
  2. When you are responsible or left with Favor, know that the people that did you wrong might later need what you have. Like Joseph, when you walk in Favor, you don’t get to choose who you pass bread out to. Sometimes you have to bless (or pass bread to) the very people that did you wrong. Remember Psalms 23, God will make your enemy your foot stool.
  3. When Favor is on your life, you must remain humble and committed. – When you are recipients of Favor, it triggers humility. Proverbs 29:23 (NKJV) says 23 A man’s pride will bring him low, But the humble in spirit will retain honor. – You can’t walk around like you are entitled to this “Favor”. When Favor is on your life, you have put your life into context. When you put your life into context, you realize that you don’t deserve nothing that you have.
    1. Proverbs 29:23 (NKJV) says 23 A man’s pride will bring him low, But the humble in spirit will retain honor.,
    2. 1 Peter 5:6 (NKJV) says 6 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, – You got to learn to stay humble!

 

How do we manage shifts with family and friendships?

    1. Learn your family’s role in your season – Don’t leave family behind as you navigate where God is taking you. Having said that, don’t drag those that are not supposed to come along with you. Hebrews 11:1 (NKJV) 11 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. In Genesis 12, God told Abraham he would make him a great nation. One of the first things Abraham did was take his wife Sarah. Why would God give you vision that would not include your spouse? Some people don’t birth the vision, because the left the person behind that they were supposed to birth vision with.
    2. After Abraham took Sarah his wife, he took his nephew Lot with him. He discovered that everyone can’t go with you from level to level in Favor.
      1. Genesis 13:5-9 (NKJV) 5 Lot also, who went with Abram, had flocks and herds and tents. 6 Now the land was not able to support them, that they might dwell together, for their possessions were so great that they could not dwell together. 7 And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsmen of Lot’s livestock. The Canaanites and the Perizzites then dwelt in the land. 8 So Abram said to Lot, “Please let there be no strife between you and me, and between my herdsmen and your herdsmen; for we are brethren. 9 Is not the whole land before you? Please separate from me. If you take the left, then I will go to the right; or, if you go to the right, then I will go to the left.”
      2. – Who did Abraham take?
        1. Sarah – Abraham took Sarah his wife, because she was necessary.
        2. Abraham also took Lot with him. He took Lot who had flocks, herds, and tents. If everyone you take with you depends on you, because they don’t have anything, then it won’t be long before you don’t have anything either.
        3. Some people in your family have herds, flocks, and tents. These are value added relationships. You need relationships that are value added when working vision.
    3. What does Favor do? Gen 13:9 says 9 Is not the whole land before you? Please separate from me. If you take the left, then I will go to the right; or, if you go to the right, then I will go to the left.”- The promise is on Abram. Abram gets wind that there is strife between his herdsmen and Lot’s herdsmen. If you will notice, he goes to Lot who is over them and not the herdsmen. Because of Favor, Abraham know he and Lot are on another level, therefore he bring his concern straight to Lot.
    4. Favor initiates communication, to avoid drama. Favor don’t let stuff linger. Favor doesn’t look for the best side. Abraham could have easily said let me pick out the best land for myself and give Lot what was left, but he didn’t do it that way. When he got Favor, it doesn’t matter, which land you end up with. Wherever we are, Favor follows us. Therefore, Abraham tells lot if you go left, I will go right.
  • When Gods hand is on your life, don’t allow relatives to delay your blessing. Genesis 31:49 (NKJV) says 49 also Mizpah,[a] because he said, “May the Lord watch between you and me when we are absent one from another. – You might have to quote this one when it comes to relatives. Taking relatives that were not intended to be part of where you are going, can hinder your blessing.

 

  1. Real friends stick with you no matter what. Proverbs 18:24 (NKJV) says 24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly,[a] But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. – You must be friendly to have friends. Real friends will stick with you during your season of lack, as well as seasons of plenty. You got to learn to be nice to people, before things drop off.
    1. A friend loves at all times. No man is your friend that denies your gift to grow. Know the significance of every opportunity. God blesses you for more than just your generation. When God blesses you, he blesses you for generations to come.
    2. Nehemiah has sons that died. As a result, she was going back to where she came from. The daughter-n-laws wanted to follow her. Nehemiah tried to get them to return back to Moab. Oprah went back, but Ruth refused to leave Nehemiah’s side.
        1. Oprah remarried and one of her sons ended up being Goliath who David slain.

       

    3. Ruth worked in fields and the man that owned the field became attracted to her. Because the owner of the field was attracted to her, she gained Favor. Later she married Boaz. This is how favor works. She didn’t have to do anything and she attracted the guy that would later be a blessing to her. She went on to become the great-grandparents of King David.
      1. David had so much Favor, he was called one after God’s own heart. Favor came to Solomon, because of the Favor of David. Esther 5:2-3 (NKJV)2 So it was, when the king saw Queen Esther standing in the court, that she found Favor in his sight, and the king held out to Esther the golden scepter that was in his hand. Then Esther went near and touched the top of the scepter. 3 And the king said to her, “What do you wish, Queen Esther? What is your request? It shall be given to you—up to half the kingdom!” – The king was drawn to Esther so he chased her. The king asked what he could do for her. She got offered half the kingdom, because of the Favor on her life.
      2. Mary had Favor. She gave birth to Jesus. Luke 2:52 (NKJV) 52 And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in Favor with God and men.

When you understand the Favor on your life, you raise your expectations

  1. Raise your level of expectation. Proverbs 8:35 (NKJV) says 35 For whoever finds me finds life, And obtains Favor from the Lord; – When you chase after God, when you find him, you find life.
      1. Matthew 6:33 (NKJV) says 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. – Once you have chosen to seek God first, you start receiving things.

     

  2. Psalm 75:6-7 (NKJV) says 6 For exaltation comes neither from the east Nor from the west nor from the south. 7 But God is the Judge: He puts down one, And exalts another. – If we are where God wants us to be, doing what God wants us to do, and giving God the glory, then no matter how circumstance look, God will create a spot for you.
    1. There is Favor on your life!
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The Power of Favor, Bible Study 05/13

Posted on May 18, 2016 by growintheword

The power of Favor

Synopsis of Bible Study 05/11-/16

Delivered by Bishop Walker III

 

Psalm 106:4 (NKJV) says 4 Remember me, O Lord, with the favor You have toward Your people.
Oh, visit me with Your salvation, – This scripture demonstrates that Jabez understood that in order to have his territory enlarged, he needed God’s hand on his life.

1 Chronicles 4:10 (NKJV) says  10 And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, “Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!” So God granted him what he requested. – Jabez was saying, “Lord bless me before you enlarge me”. He is asking for the Lord to bless him, enlarge him, and insure him, so no matter what happens, he is covered. In other words, he is saying “Lord don’t let me mishandle the blessing, so that I don’t abuse it or cause harm to other people.

  1. Jabez wanted to experience a greater life with God on the earth.
  2. Jabez asked his territory to be enlarged, because he knew he needed the blessings of God on him in order to sustain. You want blessings to come to you with God’s hands tied to it.
    1. The blessings of the Lord upon your life are not necessarily associated with tangible things. It has nothing to do with your W2. When you understand favor as things, you might covet other people’s things. The problem with coveting things other people have is some things that you covet are not part of God.
  3. We want to prosper, but we also want to do it God’s way. Proverbs 10:22 (NKJV) says 22 The blessing of the Lord makes one rich, And He adds no sorrow with it. – When favor is on your life, you will be blessed, but it won’t frustrate you. Some people are provision driven and not purposed driven. This is why they leave their purpose and chase money!
  4. If the favor on God is on it, then it is not hard, then things fall into place. In other words, you don’t have to try to fit a square into a circle. There are some things that we have turned down just to make sure that it did not interfere with our purpose.
    1. If you have to put off things that you are supposed to be doing, just to make it happen, then this is not favor, even though it may look like a blessing. For example, is it God’s will for you never to see your children? Is it God’s will for you to uproot everything just to make something else happen? God’s yoke is easy and his burdens are light.
  5. Know that your blessings will always attract haters. Haters don’t make us sorrowful. It is the stuff that surrounds your haters. It is the issues that they bring with them that make you sorrowful.

 

What is favor?

  1. Favor is characterized as the hand of God resting on your life. It is the idea of God going before you causing doors to open and keeping doors open for you continuously in your life.
  2. When you are in God’s will, favor is attracted to you. If we stay under God’s hand, he will make you a magnet to some stuff. Remember when God told Abraham that everywhere the sole of his feet touched, he would give to him?

 

The foundation of favor

Favor is the supernatural strength that gives us the ability to excel in areas, you shouldn’t have otherwise been able to excel in. God has given us the privilege to rule and to reign, as God does in heaven.

Psalm 8:4-9 (NKJV) says 4 What is man that You are mindful of him, And the son of man that You visit him? 5 For You have made him a little lower than the angels,[a]   And You have crowned him with glory and honor. 6 You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet, 7 All sheep and oxen— Even the beasts of the field, 8 The birds of the air, And the fish of the sea That pass through the paths of the seas. 9 O Lord, our Lord How excellent is Your name in all the earth! – What the psalmist is attempting to get us understand is how God supernaturally puts his abilities in our situation so that we can operate in the natural.

Hebrews 2:6-9 (NKJV) says 6 But one testified in a certain place, saying: “What is man that You are mindful of him, Or the son of man that You take care of him? 7 You have made him a little lower than the angels; You have crowned him with glory and honor,[a]    And set him over the works of Your hands. 8 You have put all things in subjection under his feet.”[b]For in that He put all in subjection under him, He left nothing that is not put under him. But now we do not yet see all things put under him. 9 But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels, for the suffering of death crowned with glory and honor, that He, by the grace of God, might taste death for everyone.- To understand the rightful place of favor, you got to understand the hierarchy of government.

The hierarchy is as follows:

  1. It is God the Father
  2. God the Son
  3. God the Holy Ghost.
    1. The God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost are one.
    2. Next is the angels
    3. Next is us

How does God demonstrate his power in heaven and on earth?

  1. When did God first come to the earth, it wasn’t the garden as many may think. Scripture says it was God’s voice. The earth is carnal and full of corruption. Heaven is representative of incorruption. Earth is finite, but heaven is infinite. When God first came to earth, he came through his son who had to have access through a woman, through flesh. Jesus Christ was God in the flesh, God in Christ. God first came to earth as Jesus Christ. He came, He died, and He rose again and is seated on the right side of the throne with all power in his hands.
  2. Angels also make trips from heaven to earth. God gives angels charge concerning you. Angels do leave heaven and come to earth. The scripture says be careful of entertaining strangers, because many have entertained angels unaware.
    1. There are times that God sends angels to block stuff on your behalf. The critical question is, if God has power in heaven and in earth, where then is our power?
  3. God said he would not leave us comfortless.
    1. The Holy Spirit came and dwelt among them. Since God the Father won’t come to earth himself, he sent his Son, the angels, and the Holy Spirit for us.
  4. Where is God? He is in us. The bible says greater is God within you than he who is in the world. Since God is in you, then wherever God is, you can go. This means you can go between heaven and earth.
    1. Jesus asked whom do they say I am? Peter said to Jesus, “Thou art the son of the living God” Jesus went on to say that on this rock he would build his church and that whatever Peter loosed in heaven, would be loosed on earth. What this really means is the word. The word you lose on earth goes to heaven and loses things that will cause things to be loosed on earth. When you release stuff to heaven, heaven responds. We have dominion over things in heaven and don’t even realize it.
    2. Psalm 21:5 (NKJV) says 5 His glory is great in Your salvation; Honor and majesty You have placed upon him. – You got glory on you. People say you different when you walk into a place. They look like you belong here. It is because there is glory on you.

God gave us dominion over the work of his hands

  1. God gave man dominion over the earth. Genesis 1:28 (NKJV) says 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
  2. God put all things under your feet. 1 Corinthians 15:27 (NKJV) says 27 For “He has put all things under His feet.”[a] But when He says “all things are put under Him,” it is evident that He who put all things under Him is excepted. – There was an angel in heaven called Lucifer. He got prideful and start wanting the praise to go to him. As result, he got cast out of heaven, because isn’t going to share his glory with anyone. At this point, Lucifer was place beneath you.
    1. Lucifer became Satan. He has been placed beneath you, so we have to stop empowering stuff that is supposed to be beneath us.

 

The faith for favor

  1. Faith activates favor – If you don’t have faith, God can’t trust you with favor. Genesis 12:1-3 (NKJV) says 12 Now the Lord had said to Abram: “Get out of your country, From your family And from your father’s house, To a land that I will show you.2 I will make you a great nation; I will bless you And make your name great; And you shall be a blessing.3 I will bless those who bless you, And I will curse him who curses you; And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.” – When you step out on faith, you attract favor in your life. You’ll be able to say, “I’m a magnet for favor”.
  2. Favor supersedes adversity. Genesis 12:10-20 (NKJV) says 10 Now there was a famine in the land, and Abram went down to Egypt to dwell there, for the famine was severe in the land. 11 And it came to pass, when he was close to entering Egypt, that he said to Sarai his wife, “Indeed I know that you are a woman of beautiful countenance. 12 Therefore it will happen, when the Egyptians see you, that they will say, ‘This is his wife’; and they will kill me, but they will let you live. 13 Please say you are my sister, that it may be well with me for your sake, and that I[a] may live because of you.”14 So it was, when Abram came into Egypt, that the Egyptians saw the woman, that she was very beautiful. 15 The princes of Pharaoh also saw her and commended her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken to Pharaoh’s house. 16 He treated Abram well for her sake. He had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male and female servants, female donkeys, and camels.17 But the Lord plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai, Abram’s wife. 18 And Pharaoh called Abram and said, “What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife? 19 Why did you say, ‘She is my sister’? I might have taken her as my wife. Now therefore, here is your wife; take her and go your way.” 20 So Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him; and they sent him away, with his wife and all that he had.– Abram went to Egypt to avoid famine. After the Pharaoh found out that Sarai was Abram’s wife, he had to leave, but he didn’t leave empty handed. With favor, you never leave empty handed. Favor has nothing to do with a zip code. It has to do with obedience and faith to move when God says move.
    1. Genesis 13:1NKJV) says 13 Then Abram went up from Egypt, he and his wife and all that he had, and Lot with him, to the South.[a] – When you have favor first, you attract the blessing. Stop apologizing for being blessed, when you have favor over your life.
    2. Genesis 14:20 (NKJV) says 20 And blessed be God Most High, Who has delivered your enemies into your hand.” And he gave him a tithe of all. – Abraham had adversaries when you are blessed. When you get more cheese, you attract more rats.
      1. Abraham gave God a 10th of it all he aha. Favor was before the law.

 God will bring new things, but other things will be restored.  
  1. Psalm 80:19 (NKJV) says 19 Restore us, O Lord God of hosts; Cause Your face to shine, And we shall be saved!, Joel 2:25-27 (NKJV) says  25 “So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, The crawling locust, The consuming locust, And the chewing locust,[a] My great army which I sent among you. 26 You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, And praise the name of the Lord your God, Who has dealt wondrously with you; And My people shall never be put to shame. 27 Then you shall know that I am in the midst of Israel: I am the Lord your God And there is no other. My people shall never be put to shame.- When you have favor, you will stop whining over what you lost.
  2. Favor brings protection- Psalm 41:11 (NKJV) 11 By this I know that You are well pleased with me, Because my enemy does not triumph over me.– my enemies try hard, but they never win.
    1. Isaiah 54:17 (NKJV) says 17 No weapon formed against you shall prosper, And every tongue which rises against you in judgment You shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, And their righteousness is from Me,” Says the Lord.,
    2. Psalm 84:12New King James Version (NKJV) 12 O Lord of hosts, Blessed is the man who trusts in You! God’s desire for you life, is to have so much favor, you don’t worry about anything that comes at you, because you know you are covered.

 

Conclusion:

There is a prayer we pray when we bless the food. We call this he blessing. It is where we thank God for the food, the hands that prepared it, and those we pray for those who may be without. When you step your prayer up to favor then it sound a little different and it goes a little deeper. When you have favor, you not only thank him for the food, you thank him that you have an appetite. When you have favor, you thank God that you don’t have to eat through a feeding tube. When you have favor you not only thank him for the job, but you thank him that you are able to do your job, even when you don’t feel like it. When you have favor, you not only thank him for the house, you thank him that your house is a home.

May God’s favor be on you…

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Be faithful with your little

Posted on May 16, 2016 by growintheword
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Conflict Resolution, Bible Study 4/27/16

Posted on May 4, 2016 by growintheword

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Synopsis of Bible Study 04/27/16

Delivered by Bishop Walker III

 

Many of us have to deal with or find ourselves in situations where we know there is going to be drama or a potential for bad blood.  As a Christian, the problem is, often you don’t know how to handle it.

Conflict can happen in your home, on your job, and yes, even at church. When conflict comes, the question becomes, how then can you say you love Christ whom you haven’t seen and hate your brother whom you see every day?

Romans 12:17 (NKJV) says 17 Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. – Do not repay evil for evil. John 16:33a (NKJV) 33 These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will[a] have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”- Know that you will have conflicts and strained relationships in this life.

Jesus makes peace available to us. Matthew 5:9 (NKJV) says 9 Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God.- We don’t want to minimize the fact that you may have been offended, because we know some offenses can be very real. What offended you may be very painful to you. However, in reconciling your offenses, you have to make commitment  to:

  1. Let go of past pain. How do we do this?
    1. By dealing with the conflict within – Romans 7:15 (NKJV) says 15 For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. – The stuff I try not to do, I keep doing. In others words, Paul acknowledges that he should reconcile the conflict within himself.
    2. Romans 7:24-25 (NKJV) says 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.- Your flesh wants to retaliate against all that is good. Your flesh wants to be right! Physiologically, God made in such a way that your body wants to correct itself. Your body goes in to save mode or self-preservation mode every time it things something is trying to harm it. For example, when you diet, you might eat like an animal when you eat again, because your body think it is starving. It is the same in the spirit of your flesh: when your flesh experiences conflict or trauma, your flesh wants to fix it, so when conflict arises, it thinks it should make the other person feel the way they made you feel.
    3. We are surround by things that teach us that we should get even during conflict. Every show we watch has some kind of scenario in it where one person is trying to pay another person back for something that they have done. A good modern example of this today would be the show called, “Empire”.


 

In order to get past conflict, we have to:

  1. Assess the problem – We need to ask ourselves, is the conflict involving this person really result of residue from past hate, hurt, or problems? We all have triggers. Sometimes, a person will trigger a trigger in you and may not even know it. When they did, they suddenly set off a Pandora Box of Hell inside of you. As a result of them setting you off, now they are paying for what you’ve been suppressing all those years. It is really unreconciled stuff from the past that has you going off and not the particular conflict you are presently facing.
    1. Name 3 things that have hurt you in the past or put you in conflict that is still tender to the touch even to this day.
    2. Romans 6:6-11 (MSG) says 6-11 Could it be any clearer? Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life—no longer at sin’s every beck and call! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ’s sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That’s what Jesus did. – That langue you can’t speak anymore is a death language. You nailed it to the cross. If you think about it, you have overcome some stuff that you don’t even realize. Some things people do to you now, would have been a problem a couple of years back.
    3. Conflicts are unreconciled stuff from our past. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV) 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.- Let go of those things from your past.
  2. Seek to solve a problem and not to prove a point- Philippians 2:4 (NKJV) 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. – You got to seek to get to the root of problem and do not use the conflict as an opportunity to prove each other wrong.
  3. Patiently listen; do not rush the process – You got to stop over talking people. If you are not careful, you will make assumptions about a person based a particular act (or conflict). We have to learn to listen. When you sit down and talk to people, you might discover something about them that you didn’t know. You might find out that the reason they acted a certain way was because of stuff that happened to them, before you got there. You might infant find out that they are remorseful for how they had acted.
    1. James 1:19-20 (NKJV) says 19 So then,[a] my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; 20 for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. – We should be slow to anger.
    2. Proverbs 12:18 (NKJV)says 18 There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes– How many people do you know that have a piercing tongue? By this we mean, whatever they say to somebody, cuts you to your core. Sometimes the things we say cause conflict.
  4. Stop reacting and start responding. Whenever something happens, we need to pause, go into our spiritual chamber, pull out some word, remind ourselves that we are not what we used to be, realize that we can no longer act that way, and then respond appropriately. Otherwise, our reaction may cause more damage than good to our relationships.
    1. Ephesians 4:29 (NKJV) says 29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. – If we allow our mouth to release bad stuff, because of a bad situation, then we open ourselves up for bad stuff to come back to us.
  5. Learn to pursue peace. There are good people in jail right now, just because they reacted, instead of responding. If you want to resolve conflict, you got to remove grudges from your life. Leviticus 19:18 (NKJV) says 18 You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord. – Getting over grudges is often the hardest part.
  6. Find methods of mediation. Matthew 5:38-40 (NKJV) 38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’[a] 39 But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. –When Jesus gave this example, he was not literally saying that you must allow people to slap you twice. Jesus was using cultural examples to teach them to go the extra mile, before doing anything you might regret later.
    1. Sometimes you may even have to involve a third party to help you resolve a conflict.

Studies show that people handle conflicts in the following ways:

  1. They give in and accept the changes someone else wants.
  2. They do nothing hoping the problem will go away.
  3. They avoid the person or the situation.
  4. They pretend the problem doesn’t bother them when it really does.
  5. They go to a higher authority.
  6. They go to court or arbitration.
  7. They fight and argue.
  8. They talk things out with another person (either in private or with a mediator)

The main goal is to move from conflict to resolution. Here are 12 strategies to help you get to a resolution.

  1. When angry, separate yourself from the situation and take the time to cool down. Women: When you are hurt, you want to talk about it right now! When men get hurt, they just want to escape the situation.
  2. Attack the problem not the person. Start with a compliment.
  3. Communicate your feeling assertively not aggressively! Express without blaming.
  4. Focus on the issue, not your position about the issue.
  5. Accept and respect that individual opinions may differ. Don’t demand compliance and be willing to agree to disagree.
  6. Don’t view the situation as a competition where one has to win and other has lose. Work towards a solution.
  7. Focus on areas of common interests and be willing to agree on them.
  8. Never jump to conclusions or make assumptions about what the other is feeling. Lots of times, we think people have an attitude not realizing that they may have had a mountain of stuff that happened to them during the day, before they reached you. All bad moods or attitudes are not because of you or the current conflict.
  9. Forget the past and stay in the present.
  10. Build power with, not power over others.
  11. Thank the person for listening.

How do we move to a place of peace?

  1. Deal with the problem directly, the moment it happens. Don’t allow the devil to have an opportunity to create something out of nothing.
    1. Proverbs 18:19 (NKJV) says 19 A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, And contentions are like the bars of a castle. ,
    2. Ephesians 4:26 (NKJV) says 26 “Be angry, and do not sin”:[a] do not let the sun go down on your wrath, – The whole point is you have to come to a point where you learn not to walk around angry.
    3. Colossians 3:13 (NKJV) says, 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. –

All of us have been offended. The first thing that Jesus did on the cross was say the word, “Forgive them…” We must make certain that we understand that the God in you is greater than the evil in them. Sometimes you have to say I’m sorry even when you haven’t done anything wrong. You can never hate me more than I can love you. If we receive forgiveness from the Lord for all that we have done, then we must be willing to extend the same forgiveness to others. This isn’t a message to say you got to go and kick it with the person that offended you, but know that prior conflicts  makes the awkward moments. Today is the day to say, “Lord I let that stuff go so that I can be free”. Love is greater than anything on the planet. You will never change what you will not confront. You got to deal with conflict directly and immediately. We don’t have to like you, but we sure do have to love you.

 

 

 

 

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