Overcoming Doubt – Bible Study 11.20.19

Posted on November 22, 2019 by growintheword

2-Part Series: Defeating Doubt and Discouragement

Part I: Overcoming Doubt

Bishop Joseph W. Walker, III, DMin.
November 20, 2019

Bible Study Synopsis

Psalm 42:11, “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.”

       I.          Introduction

  • Some things in life cause us to doubt what we believe. You must recognize at this point that doubt has creeped in on you.
  • Doubt unfortunately is part of our human make up.

Here are two examples of doubt found in the bible.

  1. Gideon – Shies away from God’s call.
  2. Gideon tested God twice (in the scripture below) because he didn’t believe that one man could go against a predator of God’s people.

Judges 6:36-40 (NKJV)

36 So Gideon said to God, “If You will save Israel by my hand as You have said— 37 look, I shall put a fleece of wool on the threshing floor; if there is dew on the fleece only, and it is dry on all the ground, then I shall know that You will save Israel by my hand, as You have said.” 38 And it was so. When he rose early the next morning and squeezed the fleece together, he wrung the dew out of the fleece, a bowlful of water. 39 Then Gideon said to God, “Do not be angry with me, but let me speak just once more: Let me test, I pray, just once more with the fleece; let it now be dry only on the fleece, but on all the ground let there be dew.” 40 And God did so that night. It was dry on the fleece only, but there was dew on all the ground.  – God removed Gideons doubt by responding to his fleece test and by using him to lead God’s people to victory.

  1. Sarah – Doubt caused her to laugh at God’s promise
  2. God spoke to Abraham and Sarah saying that they would birth a son at their old age. Sarah was 89 and Abraham was 99 at the time.

 

Genesis 18:10-15 (NKJV)

10 And He said, “I will certainly return to you according to the time of life, and behold, Sarah your wife shall have a son.”(Sarah was listening in the tent door which was behind him.) 11 Now Abraham and Sarah were old, well advanced in age; and [a]Sarah had passed the age of childbearing. 12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, “After I have grown old, shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?” 13 And the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh, saying, ‘Shall I surely bear a child, since I am old?’ 14 Is anything too hard for the Lord? At the appointed time I will return to you, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.” 15 But Sarah denied it, saying, “I did not laugh,” for she was afraid. And He said, “No, but you did laugh!” -God hears Sarah laugh and he asks Abraham is there anything too hard for him.

  1. Where there is doubt, you question the character and power of God.

     II.          What is Doubt?

  1. Defining Doubt
    The secular definition of doubt is: to call into question the truth of: to be uncertain or in doubt about.

    1. Doubt in the Scripture can be seen to be characteristic of both believers and unbelievers. In believers it is usually a weakness of faith, a wavering in the face of God’s promises. In the unbeliever doubt is virtually synonymous with unbelief. – Scripture looks at doubt for what it really is. It doesn’t downplay doubt as we usually do.
  2. Doubt vs. Unbelief
    1. Does doubt make me a non-believer? Being a believer doesn’t mean that you won’t have moments of doubt.

John 10:26 (NKJV)

26 But you do not believe, because you are not of My sheep, [a]as I said to you.  – These were unbelievers

Mark 9:24 (NKJV)

24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” – He is a believer that had some doubt.

Matthew 14:31 (NKJV)

31 And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” – Peter doubted in a certain moment. Doubt is not the absence of faith; it is instead moments of unbelief.

  • Hang around doubters long enough and you will start to doubt.
  1. Characteristics of Doubters

Four Characteristics of Doubters
1. Doubters are uncertain about decisions.
2. Doubters are distrustful.
3. Doubters tend to call on logic and reason.
4. Doubters hesitate before acting.

Some scripture examples of doubt

Matthew 14:31 (NKJV)

31 And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Matthew 12:38-42 (NKJV)

38 Then some of the scribes and Pharisees answered, saying, “Teacher, we want to see a sign from You.”39 But He answered and said to them, “An evil and adulterous generation seeks after a sign, and no sign will be given to it except the sign of the prophet Jonah. 40 For as Jonah was three days and three nights in the belly of the great fish, so will the Son of Man be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth. 41 The men of Nineveh will rise up in the judgment with this generation and condemn it, because they repented at the preaching of Jonah; and indeed a greater than Jonah is here. 42 The queen of the South will rise up in the judgment with this generation and condemn it, for she came from the ends of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and indeed a greater than Solomon is here.

Matthew 21:21 (NKJV)

21 So Jesus answered and said to them, “Assuredly, I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but also if you say to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea,’ it will be done.

Mark 11:23 (NKJV)

23 For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says.

 Luke 24:38 (NKJV)

38 And He said to them, “Why are you troubled? And why do doubts arise in your hearts?

John 20:27 (NKJV)

27 Then He said to Thomas, “Reach your finger here, and look at My hands; and reach your hand here, and put it into My side. Do not be unbelieving, but believing.”

    III.          How Does Doubt Affect the Believer?

  1. Instability in Your Faith

James 1:6-8 (NKJV)

6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. 7 For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; 8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. – Wherever there is doubt, there is no stability. This means that you are easily swayed.

  1. Falling Short of the Goal

Philippians 3:14 (NKJV)

14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. – I’m not going to be distracted by past things. I’m constantly pushing towards what God has called me to.

    IV.          How to Overcome Doubt

  1. Learn to Trust God
  2. Do you really trust god? Jesus tells the disciples, let us pass over to the other side. Jesus then gets on the ship and goes to sleep. When the storm comes, the disciples panic and then they go wake up Jesus and ask if he cares that they might perish. If Jesus has said us (keyword) is going over, then why do you let what happens in between, make you doubt what he has said.

Soren Kierkegaard once stated, “Every mental act is composed of doubt and belief, but it is belief that is the positive, it is belief that sustains thought and holds the world together.”

  1. Five Ways to Overcome Doubt
    Have faith – You need to have faith in God and in yourself. You have to believe God has equipped you. God knows everything about you, before he calls you.

    2. Stop worrying about what others think. The reason why you doubt him is because you are worried about the crowd response (This is something I personally have had a problem with all my life).

    3. Move from contemplation to action. Move from contemplation to action. Stop talking and thinking about it. Just do it.

    4. Don’t be afraid of failure. You will never know if God can do it, if you don’t try it.

    5. Stop wasting time investing in doubt

 

  1. Combat doubt by re-realizing the truth. You have to let it go.

 

  1. Here are some scriptures about re-realizing truth.


Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall [a]direct your paths.

John 20:31 (NKJV)

31 but these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that believing you may have life in His name.

Romans 4:20 (NKJV)

20 He did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God,

 

“Face your fears and doubts, and new worlds will open to you.” – Robert Kiyosaki – Abraham had to leave his country on Gods command. He was blessed, because he didn’t doubt what God had told him to do.

     V.          Stop Worrying and Stand on His Word

2 Corinthians 1:20 (NKJV)

20 For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us. – Everything that God promises had a yes attached to it.

Philippians 4:6 (NKJV)

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; – Doubt dilutes the promise of God concerning your life.

Proverbs 12:25 (NIV)

25 Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up. – Faith itself is your greatest weapon towards doubt.

Hebrews 11:1 (NKJV)

11 Now faith is the [a]substance of things hoped for, the [b]evidence of things not seen. – Now faith is the first two words in this scripture. The word “Now” deals with current, immediate, or right now. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God according to the book of Romans. – We are going to dissect the meaning of this scripture.

 

The word of God is a revelation. It is a living word. There can be no relevance if there is no revelation.

Now the revelation is our foundation. When doubt comes in, the revelation is our foundation. Our revelation counters the doubt. We have a living word inside of us. When doubt comes in our revelation which is our foundation counters it. For example, when doubt says the bill won’t be paid, the revelation says God will supply all my needs.

Now faith is: The revelation I am standing on, is. In other words, we are not waiting to be healed, we are healed. When you lay holt of this revelation, you won’t have doubt on your life, no matter what anyone says.

Your revelation changes your situation. Faith is the substance of things hoped for. It is the substance of hope. What fuels this is the foundation. It causes us to hope when the evil is attacking you.  This is why the enemy is after your hope. When a person is ready to jump, he has lost hope.

Where there is doubt there is no stability or foundation. My revelation reminds me of who I am.

Evidence of things not seen: Our whole life we been trained to respond to what we see. This is why the enemy tries to show you things that lead to losing a hold of our hope.

We don’t look at things the way others look at things. We expect miracles. Where there is no revelation, there is no expectation. We have to let you know that we expect something to happen.

An act of faith. You drive to the gas pump, because you need gas. You put your debit card in the pump and then you swipe it. You believe by faith that what’s in the gas pump is actually pumping into your car. You don’t see the gas, yet you believe. You drive all-around town just because your indicator says your tank is on full. You might not see the miracle now, but you have someone by you that is like the fuel indicator in the car. You might not see the wind, but the leaves will testify that the wind is blowing.

We see Peter walking on the water. He gets out of the boat, but do we really know Peter saw Jesus. Maybe he didn’t see him at first. We say this, because the scripture says they thought they saw a ghost and Peter said if it be you, let me come. He stepped out on the faith that this was Jesus.

We have to walk in faith and starve our doubt. Don’t let your doubt cause you to miss what God has promised you.

 

God bless!

 

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When Nothing Else Will Do , sermon 071419

Posted on July 30, 2019 by growintheword

 

Part II of the sermon series entitled “Closer”

Synopsis of July 14th sermon

Delivered by Bishop Joseph W. Walker, III, D.Min.

 

Psalm 42:1-5, “As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God? 3 My tears have been my food day and night, while they continually say to me, “Where is your God?” 4 When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go with the multitude; I went with them to the house of God, With the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast. 5 Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance.”

 

      I.          Introduction

  1. Everyone comes to a point where their appetite changes.
  2. Sometimes you can get exposed to a different type of food and suddenly your appetite changes. As a result, you now desire greater food and now you won’t except things below what you know is possible to obtain.
    1. For example, if a woman meets a King that treats here like a Queen, she will no longer accept
  3. Psalm 34:8 (NKJV) says 8 Oh, taste and see that the Lord isgood; Blessed is the man who trusts in Him! – When you taste of the goodness of God, nothing else satisfies you. Today we are privileged to eaves drop on the Psalmist. In the scripture we see that the Psalmist loans to be back into relationship with God.
  4. The writer is in a dark place, the place of
  5. He is taunted by those that used to go with him into the temple. They don’t understand his season.
  6. It is one thing to walk with those that don’t know, but it’s another thing if it is people that is supposed to know you, yet can’t understand you and your situation.
  7. For the believer, he or she is like the deer is panting for the water. He now needs refreshing. The writer uses this illustration to illustrate how he longs for God.

 

    II.          Desire for the Living God

A.    What I run to can keep me alive

  1. This is a time to run to God. Water represents source. The body can’t live without water and in the same manner, the soul can’t live without the presence of God.

 

  1. John 4:14 (NKJV) says 14 but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.”
    • When God gives us fulfillment, we will no longer have need of anything.
  2. Some people are thirsty, and they think they can go around on just a drip instead of a drink.
    • With all the hell you are dealing with, a sip ain’t going to get it!
  3. The Lord doesn’t need you being thirsty.

 

 

B.     Thirst for what’s real will lead to being filled

  1. You can’t expect people to quench your thirst. We think people can fulfill it for us and they blow it every time.
  2. Both the Husband and the Wife go out to work these days. They leave full, but we come back empty.
  3. Only God can fill you up. When you walk through life whole, you don’t wait for people to fill you. You are are already
  4. In this day and time, we think tangible stuff makes us fulfilled.
  5. How odd it is to use the word “drip” to define our stuff. If it is just a drip, then you still end up
  6. It’s not the things that money can buy, it’s the things that money can’t buy. If I focus on the things that money can’t buy, then if I lose everything I have, I won’t lose my mind, because I know where my fulfillment comes from.
  7. God will give to you in a way where you won’t need again. You are about to embark on a season where you won’t need for anything. When God becomes our fulfillment, we don’t have wants, because we are connected to the source.
  8. Have you come to place where you think it doesn’t make sense?

 

  III.          Dealing with Distress Led to Remembrance

A.    Your enemies desire to see you defeated

  1. It is important to know what your enemy is up to. Your friend-enemies have one goal, they want to steal from you. Stealing from you can also be taking years off your life.
    1. Remember the Psalmist was being ridiculed by people who use to run with him.
  2. Why do our so-called friends try to condemn us? Know that God will cover you.
  3. Psalm 27:5  (NKJV) 5 For in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion; In the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me; He shall set me high upon a rock.- Remember the times God hid your issues from others?
    1. Know that some flashbacks you have will free you?
  4. If you ever calm the chaos long enough you will come to this place. Philippians 4:8-9  (NKJV) says 8 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things arelovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. 9 The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.- You got to learn how to think yourself out of a dark place.

 

  1. Your mind will play tricks on you. You got to arrest those thoughts and think yourself When we do this, you mute the noise behind you.
  2. We think like we think. We have to think like we are trying to think ourselves out of this dark place. If you think, you will thank! In other words, if you are thinking right, it will eventually bring you to a point of thanking God!

 

 IV.          Decision to Lift Up Praise

A.    Encourage yourself to escape it

  1. One of the things the enemy wants to do is to get you to isolate yourself. Get your own party hat and encourage yourself.
  2. If you care about what others think, you will always be their prisoner – las Tzu . Caring too much about what others think will have you asking questions like: What wrong with me? Why am I looking like this?
  3. Stop allowing the hell you are going through be inside you.

 

 

B.     Look like He lifted you out of it

 

Start looking like you’ve been lifted out of it. Now how do we do this?

  1. By running after darkness is over. Once the storm is over, we ought to give God praise for all that he has done for us!
  2. Declare that I may get discouraged, but I will never disconnect. I will not let my situation change my relationship with the one that can change my situation.
  3. Know that when you lift Him up, he will lift you up!

 

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A Blessing at My Breaking Point

Posted on July 23, 2019 by growintheword

 

Part 1 of the Closer series

July 7, 2019  Sermon Synopsis

Delivered by Bishop Joseph W. Walker, III, D.Min.

 

Matthew 11:28-29, “28 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

 

I.          Introduction

  1. Breaking point – This point where you reach your max point as it relates to things that you can

 

  1. When the foreclosure sign was put in your front yard, this is an example of a breaking point. When no financial aid has come in and it is time to start class, this is an example of a breaking point.

 

  1. All of us have experienced moments where we have been pushed to the edge. God is sending you this word today to let you know that your breaking point is about you being closer to Him.

 

  1. Know that whatever is challenging you, will not be the end of your vision and it won’t be the end of you.

 

  1. Rest mentioned in verse 28 implies support and exchange. In other words, give it to him and God will give you something you can bear.

 

  1. The scripture says “Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest”. When you see the word rest, think of the word peace. God is saying to us that at our breaking point, he will give us

 

  1. “Take my yoke on you” the scripture goes on to say. The yoke was the thing that was placed on the ox’s neck to control them. This yoke would cause the ox to go in the direction that the farmer wanted them to go. God will put a yoke on us, and He will guide us and lead us. He will try to show us how to live a life that is free.

 

 

 

II.          Comfort for Laborers and the Heavy Laden

 

A.    You have to come to the Lord to receive from Him

  1. You must get closer to the Lord. He is not a harsh teacher. He instead nurtures you.

 

  1. What you are burdened down with, you can no longer handle. You can’t deal with this without a
  2. Even though it is free, you have to RSVP. The Lord won’t just assume that you want this peace in your life. You have to ask for it.

 

  1. Scripture References: John 16:24  (NKJV) says 24 Until now you have asked nothing in My name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.

 

  1. Matthew 7:7  (NKJV) says 7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

 

  1. Mark 11:24  (NKJV) says 24 Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have   – Everything you need is in Him. It is not in the other people you often go to. The answer is in God. Your peace, your healing, your breakthrough is in him.

 

B.     Rest is available for those who are ready

  1. Are you ready?

 

  1. You have got to get to a place in your life where you are willing to allow God to do what’s necessary to distress you.

 

  1. David was acquainted with stress. He got a revelation. He realized that the Lord was his shepherd.

 

  1. David realized that the Lord would make him lie down in green pastures. When God is ready for you to rest, he will make you rest. Whether its voluntarily or involuntarily, you will rest.

 

  1. When you lie down and rest, God will restore you. Too many of us are trying to get restored on the run.

 

  1. Sometimes God has to treat you like a car that is not running correctly. He has to put you in the garage and jack you up, so He can take a good look at the problem.

 

  1. There is a little control freak in all of us. When you are ready to relinquish control, God will step in.

 

  1. Scripture Reference: Psalm 23:2-3  (NKJV) says 2 He makes me to lie down in [a]green pastures; He leads me beside the [b]still waters. 3 He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.

 

 

III.          Command to Learn from the Lord

A.    Be steered by what’s right instead of being controlled by what’s wrong.

 

  1. We often stay in the rut, because we continue to do what feels is right to us. We find out later that doing what we thought was the right thing was not necessarily doing the right thing, because God never intended for us to be slaves to anything.

 

  1. Think about it. You can even do dysfunction the right way, but it will still be the wrong thing to do.

 

  1. Scripture References: Leviticus 26:13  (NKJV) says 13 I amthe Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that you should not be their slaves; I have broken the bands of your yoke and made you walk [a]– God wants you to be free of bondage, pressure, and sin!

 

  1. James 1:12-14  (NKJV) says 12 Blessed isthe man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. 13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. 14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.

 

  1. When the Lord leads you and guides you, you will be led in the right direction.

 

B.     His guidance is a gift that is gentle

 

  1. Scripture Reference: Psalm 23:4  (NKJV) says 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You arewith me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. – God brings correction in the areas of your life, when you are out of order. When the sheep was out of order the rod and staff corrected them. The rod was for correction and staff was for

 

  1. How many times have god hit you with rod? How man times have you felt the staff pull you right back into position?

 

  1. God does this to bring you to a place of humility.

 

IV.          Contentment to Live this Life

 

A.    Nothing compares to the contentment of the Creator

 

  1. Scripture Reference: 1 Timothy 6:6  (NKJV) says 6 Now godliness with contentment is great gain.– Stop living your life to impress others and learn to impress God.
  2. Hebrews 12:1  (NKJV) says 12 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us,and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, – I have my own race. I have to learn to stay in your own lane.

 

  1. God is trying to work things out in your life, but you keep looking to everyone else for the answer to your problems.

 

B.     You will be free from it, when your soul finds rest

 

 

 

  1. Scripture References: John 8:36  (NKJV) says 36 Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.
  2. When a slave was about to get free, they got a blow to the ear. The slaves were good with this, because this meant freedom was close. Just like this, the Lord never intends to put you on a platform without a test.

 

  1. What are you willing to go through to get what God has for your life? God uses the trial to set you up for what you are about to go to.
  1. Psalm 55:6(NKJV) says 6 So I said, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. – There is a moment where you realize there is a need for peace.

 

  1. There are many of you right now that need peace. You got to bring it to the Lord.

 

  1. The benefits of being Committed
  2. The breakthrough is for the obedient.

 

  1. On the other side of what you are going through is the the greatest thing you have experienced in your life. You’re about to find peace, once you turn this stuff over to the Lord.

 

  1. This is the 1st month of the second half of 2019. I declare this half will be better than the first half! God has moved you from your breaking point to your

 

  1. Breakthrough is about to hit your house! You got to decide, “I’m letting go of everything that stresses me and am going to align with things that blesses me”.

 

  1. Rest in him now. The best season is around the corner!

 

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What You Need to Know to Be with Me, Bible Study 02/06/19

Posted on February 14, 2019 by growintheword

 

Bible Study 4-Part Series
Series Title: Love Clinic

Week One: What You Need to Know to Be With Me

Synopsis of 02/06/19 Bible Study

Delivered by Bishop Joseph W. Walker, III, D.Min.

John 15:10-12, “10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 11 “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. 12 This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”

I.          Introduction

  1. Relationships, friendships, marriage all take on different meanings today. For instance, 20 yrs ago the term “dating” was viewed much different from the way we view these type of relationships today.
  2. It is hard to know what Dating is today. Today, when we say we are dating we wonder is the person is saying that the two are seeing each other or does it mean they are doing something else?
  3. Friendships today are the same way. We view Friendships so casual now, everyone seems to be our friend. Friendships should really carry a certain weight and responsibility.
  4. Marriages are different. We see a lot of different types of marriages. First, we have the Image Marriage, then we have the “I want a baby marriage”. Next, we have the “I got pregnant and we got married” type of Marriage. We also have the “Everyone but us, sees us as being good together” type of marriage.
  5. There are uncompromising standards for healthy godly relationships. You got to take time to learn things about the other person to make the relationship work.

Steps to Having a Healthy Godly Relationship:

  1. Love God First. – You’ve got to be in relationship with God first. If you spend more time in your relationship than you do with God, then you know it is an out of whack relationship.

Scripture References: Mark 12:30 (NKJV) 30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ [a]This is the first commandment. – God wants you to let Him be your priority. You have to have a relationship with God first, before you can have a relationship with anyone else.

 Matthew 6:33 (NKJV) 3 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. – You got to get to a point where you want to get right with God first. God might frustrate your attempts to get into relationship, because you haven’t first got into relationship with Him.

 

  1. Learn to love God first.

 

  1. Learn to Love Yourself.

 

Scripture Reference: Ephesians 5:29 (NKJV) 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. – Don’t be so busy loving everyone else that you sacrifice yourself. You got to get to a point where you take care of you. You can’t give what you ain’t got.

 

  1. If you don’t like you, who else will love you? Invest in yourself. Take care of yourself. Don’t get into relationship and let yourself go.

 

  1. Pray to Discern if this Person is Right for Your Life. – Discernment can be important when it comes to relationships.

 

Scripture Reference: 1 Corinthians 2:14 (NKJV) 14 But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.   – Often, we go into relationship through our flesh.

  1. Relationship must be discerned in the spirit and not in the flesh.
  2. Earthly people start with perception first. The image portrayed by the person that interests you, feeds your perception.
  3. Spiritual people start with integrity. Questioning the integrity of a person will lead to the truth. This makes Holy Wedlock and Unholy Padlock.
  4. Get to Know the Real Person. – You got to know the person to the core.

 

Scripture Reference: John 8:32 (NKJV) 32 And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”  – We spend more time researching a puppy we want to buy, than the person we want to be with.

“Hell is truth seen too late.” –Thomas Hobbes

  1. Don’t’ get caught up in perception. Get to the truth by discernment.

 

  1. What Makes Me Want You
  2. The capacity of your compassion comes from Christ
  3. You can accept things better when you know the truth. A lot of people think a person wouldn’t want them, knowing the truth about them.

2.      Love is not based on what you get in return. It is unconditional.

Scripture References: 1 Peter 4:8 (NIV) (NIV) 8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. – I love you to the point that I can love you knowing everything about you. It is hard to love all that, if you don’t know all of that.

  1. When you love deeply it is more than physical connection or lust. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (NIV) 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor oth ers, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. – Love me without losing yourself.

 

  1. You should be the same after you come together with a person. You shouldn’t have to lose yourself to be with someone.

B.      You can love me without losing you

Scripture References: Psalm 139:14 14 I will praise You, for [a]I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. ; – You are wonderfully made.

  1. Wonderfully made – The root word for wonderfully is wonderful. You are wonderful.
  2. People package you together and people don’t know who you are. You can’t give your status away to be in a mediocre relationship.
  • Genesis 2:24 (NKJV) 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be[a] joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.;- One flesh doesn’t mean you turn magically into one person. It means you ae joined together at the heart. This is why every attack on a relationship deals with the heart
  • Ezekiel 36:26 (NKJV) 26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. – A heart made of stone makes you un able to love. Your heart is the biggest gift you can ever give somebody.
  • Proverbs 4:23 (NKJV) 23 Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. – You got to be able to keep your heart in a good place. People have to be able to earn your heart.

III. Walking with Wisdom

  1. Learn me or leave me– You got to know a person. You need to know what makes them cry and what makes them shutdown along with other things that make them perk? You have to study people.

Ex – 2 yrs after Bishop’s first wife died, he started dating. While dating, one of things he used to do is study the person he was trying to date. In other words, he wanted to know what triggers them to cry or what makes them shutdown and other things similar to this. He explained that by doing this, it taught him when he should talk to a person and when he should approach the person he was dating.

  1. The most important thing about your relationship is knowing that the other person understands you and knowing that they get you.

2.      Michal was married to King David for years. After the ark of the covenant returns to Israel, David danced so hard, he danced out of his clothes. While all of this is going on, David’s wife Michal looks out the window at him.

Scripture Reference: 2 Samuel 6:16 (NKJV) 16 Now as the ark of the Lord came into the City of David, Michal, Saul’s daughter, looked through a window and saw King David leaping and whirling before the Lord; and she despised him in her heart.

2 Samuel 6:20-23 (NKJV) 20 Then David returned to bless his household. And Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David, and said, “How glorious was the king of Israel today, uncovering himself today in the eyes of the maids of his servants, as one of the base fellows [a]shamelessly uncovers himself!” 21 So David said to Michal, “It was before the Lord, who chose me instead of your father and all his house, to appoint me ruler over the people of the Lord, over Israel. Therefore I will play music before the Lord. 22 And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight. But as for the maidservants of whom you have spoken, by them I will be held in honor.” 23 Therefore Michal the daughter of Saul had no children to the day of her death. – Michal despised David (her husband) in her heart. She didn’t understand him.

  1. If you are busy, you can’t marry lazy. David is dancing and Michal is at home. David has this high spiritual experience and he’s hype. He wants to bring the expiring to his house, but Michal disapproves.
  2. In verse 21, David explained God has this ordained him before he put David and Michal together. Milco didn’t bore children, because David stopped being intimate with here, because she didn’t understand him.

B.      Timing is everything

Scripture References: Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NKJV) 3 To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:  – Don’t rush the process, just because you are ready to get down the aisle. People spend more time getting ready to get married, than they do working in their marriage to make it successful.

  1. You have to learn how to invest and wait. Ruth waited and Boaz approached her. Boaz studied her. Sometimes you can meet the right person at the wrong time. You have to study the person you are interested in.
    1. Ruth 2:23 (NKJV) 23 So she stayed close by the young women of Boaz, to glean until the end of barley harvest and wheat harvest; and she dwelt with her mother-in-law.

 

  1. Working Well to Win

A.     I’m a package deal

1.      You need someone that works well with you.

Scripture Reference: James 5:16 (NKJV) 16 [a]Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, [b]fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. – Have a mutual understanding between the two of you.

B.      Work with me, not against me

Scripture References: Amos 3:3 (NKJV) 3 Can two walk together, unless they are agreed? – In relationship you need a ride or die. It is hard to be ride or die if you have only met your image.

Proverbs 18:24 (NKJV) 24 A man who has friends [a]must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. ; – There is a person that will love you despite your baggage.

1 Peter 3:7, 8 (NKJV) 7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. 8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be [a]courteous; – We are in this, because we are on our way somewhere together. If we enter relationship, we have similar paths or goals.

  1. Anyone that will stifle your dream, is a person that is only tolerating you and not celebrating you.
  2. Relationships matter. You know how hard it is for you to be with yourself. Know that there must be someone out there anointed just to be with you.

 

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